i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
