I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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