I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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