And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
