walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Can you bring me the toilet please
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
