**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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