Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
