margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
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