come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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