everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
