Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Randomize
