you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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