I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
