Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
