would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize