I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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