so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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