wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize
