new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize