ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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