I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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