he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize