doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
You've changed since you got that strap on
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