...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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