Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I can't turn off my feet"
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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