Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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