I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize
