Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
