Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize