Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
