I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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