Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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