fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
