I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Randomize
