I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
