And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
