I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
