Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
