Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
