please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
My balls are so social today.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
