god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i think i have herpe
just one?
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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