If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
