I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
