This girl is more easily done than said...
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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