we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
