accomplished twins. life is a go
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
