i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
