How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
These tits shall not be calmed
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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