So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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