My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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